Wednesday, January 11, 2012

I gotta love it!

6:30 a.m. Noooo!
Last/my first semester of college was pretty easy. I slept late (until I got a job) and I enjoyed having free time. That all went bye bye this semester. I'm not complaining you know because it has been a blessing but Lordy if I ain't ready for a break already! It's days like today that I have to stop and remember what exactly am I going for. Not just for school but life. Where do I want to take myself and my sweet husband of course. We both have dreams that we discuss sometimes daily just to recollect. It's a blessing knowing that we can wake up with a new start and not worry about the little things. Yeah, we stress a little with some bills and wonder what will happen next that we can't really afford but in the end I gotta love it because God always provides.
No one could have ever prepared me enough of the difficulties a wife faces. Gladly I am not a mother yet so I have no clue about that. But, the stress, the shopping, the preparing, the making sure he brushed his teeth and has everything he needs for a successful day, the cooking, the cleaning, the countless chores and errands that must be done in order for yourself to have a productive day on top of school and work. Inhale. Exhale. Bed time. And half your "To Do's" didn't even get touched.
Oh how I love my marriage and it's challenges. Waking up to him and knowing we have a new day and that God is in control makes all the difference. I GOTTA LOVE IT!! <3

Monday, September 5, 2011

Wedding Day

I wake up, it's 9:14 am. I close my eyes and try to remember what the day is. My brain is blank. I reach for my phone, I have so many text messages from facebook. I exit out to see the date. It's "Sat, Jul 30, 2011, 9:17 am". My body is filled with joy and I realize I have to be at church at 10:30. I throw my hair up in a bun, jump in the bath and grab some clothes. My stepdad is ironing. My mom is finishing bird seed bags. I grab boxes. Look at my room. Grab bags. Look at my room. Grab my dress and shoes. Look at my room. I stop, look at my room. So empty. So simple. I miss it already. A tear forms in my eye, my nose starts to burn. "I'm gonna miss you." I tell my mom we're running late, hug my stepdad tightly and remind him to be at the church at 1:30.

The ride to the church, my mom grabs my hand, and reminds how much she loves me and how much she's going to miss me. I'm her baby. Her baby is getting married and moving 30 minutes away to another town. She's going to become a woman today, a wife. She's going to walk down a center aisle in a beautiful white dress and her last name will change to Lambert.

At church we do my hair in the bathroom until Mr. Tracy unlocks the nursery door. Once we get in there, time starts going faster. Before I know it, it's 1:30. Everyone is here for pictures and to see the beautiful bride as she gets ready. My best friend is here, my matron, my hair dresser, my photographer, everyone. I start to get nervous, my heart starts to pound. I'm getting married today. My matron makes me laugh by singing a silly song, "the cow says moo, the duck say quack..." and playing with my shoes. I'm looking out of my eyes, watching this amazing movie, feeling all the emotion. Making sure I don't miss a beat. Remember everything, Jennifer. Pictures after pictures. Trying to consume my time. People coming to see me. Mrs. Carmen keeps singing to make me laugh rather than cry. You can't ruin your makeup before the wedding. My dress gets annoying, feet are already hurting. I sit. I have to pee. The weirdest experience of my life. I think in the back of my mind how happy I am that I didn't have a bachelorette party. No hang over, yes! (just kidding)

Back to the room. It's almost time, we get ready. -Positions- My stomach has butterflies. I wonder what has been going through his mind? Is he at the alter waiting for me? Will he think I am beautiful? Will he say "I do"? I brush the thoughts off because they don't matter. We slowly exit the room. My ring carrier has to go potty. Now my train carrier. It's past 3:00. My husband is waiting. The music plays. The bridal party enters. Waiting patiently. Make eye contact with my stepdad. We enter. People standing. Oh's and ah's fill the room. I pay no attention to who's there. Stay focused on being graceful.  Me and Rodney (stepdad) connect. I look forward, find Phillip. He's there. Smiling, not cheesy, not fake. Blissfully smiling. We get to the stairs, I almost trip. Oh no. But we keep going. I hear words, my hand is given to Phillip's hand. We make eye contact. Everything is beautiful. He looks stunningly hansome. The Pastor says something and Phillip answers. Come back to reality, Jennifer. My leg is nodding to keep me from fainting. "A Moment Like This" plays. We laugh as we sing softly. He tells me I look amazingly beautiful. My heart skips a beat and I remember to stay focused. The service goes on. I peek out to the audience. Every seat is filled, even though we're minus some people. But everyone's in their Sunday best. David sings "God Gave Me You". My strap is falling, I pull it up. My hands are clammy, Phillip reminds me. I love him so much, I tell him. We laugh, giggle, blush, look deep into each others eyes and then the words form Pastor's mouth are, "Phillip, you may  kiss you wife." We kiss. I can't believe it, we're married. That kiss was beautiful and I loved every moment of it. Pastor introduces us as Mr. and Mrs. Donald Phillip Lambert, we leave to "Don't Stop Believing", and I forget my bouquet. Go back and get it. Everyone is clapping, some are laughing at us dancing down the aisle. A lot are crying. It's beautiful. All of it.